


Fear

by Captain_Sili



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Fear, Other, Star Trek - Freeform, i don't know how to tag, space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-18
Updated: 2017-06-18
Packaged: 2018-11-15 20:13:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11238351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Captain_Sili/pseuds/Captain_Sili
Summary: A short piece I wrote a while back.





	Fear

Fear. I’ve never understood the concept of it. You find something about a circumstance that you find scary. I don't get it. All fear does, is put you as a disadvantage. It's a weak spot to enemies that they can exploit. If you fear something, you will most certainly lose.  
I have noticed that humans tend to fear illogical things. The darkness? Seriously? What is there to be scared of in the dark? Humans have it easy. At least they see daylight. It is always night on Nital. There is no star to shine close enough to us. Heights. How are heights even the slightest scary. You think being on top of a three story building is scary, I ran a starship in outer space. That is quite a bit further up than a building. The Ocean. It's a crater full of water. If you cannot swim, then don't go into the ocean. The creatures within don't even intend harm to humans, only when provoked do they strike.  
What I find odd, is despite being scared of the most illogical things, humans seem to face danger head on, without thinking or planning first. The most logical thing to do, is to plan something out. Never run into a situation you have not planned for. It will only end badly. Despite all of the danger, humans tend to not be afraid of any of it. It makes no sense. If they can face something like this, without fear, then how is it they are afraid of the simplest things?  
We don't fear things. Fear, is what determines your fate. If you fear that you will lose, you will lose. If you fear that a crew member will become lost, they will become lost. If you fear you will die in a battle, you will die in a battle. It puts that thought into your mind, and when you think upon it, you act upon it.   
I find myself sometimes backing down from fights. Never once do I fear the circumstance i'm in. Yet, I don't understand why I back down. Even if i know exactly what i'm doing, and I have a high chance of winning, I still back down sometimes. I try to see what may cause me to do this, yet I can't figure it out. It's almost illogical how little sense it makes.  
Fear is illogical. That’s just that. I avoid circumstances, not out of fear, out of knowing the odds of winning are too low to bother trying. Worrying if you are going to lose, will decrease your chance of winning. You must focus on the the task at hand, to focus on winning, not on the chances of losing. Yet, even when odds are in our favour, I still reluctantly decide whether to attempt the task or not. I cannot fear anything.  
Worrying leads to fear. Fear leads to panic. Panic leads to chaos. Chaos leads to our demise. Simple concept to remember. Now, humans may find it hard to fear nothing, but the least they can do, it attempt to conceal it. If you ignore it, then it's like it's not even there. You can do that with any emotion really. It's not that hard. Only fear, is a major emotion. It is difficult to hide this emotion for humans. It is quite obvious to me when one is afraid. Typical behaviour gives it away. Shaking, stuttering, swaying. Only a few things that give it away.   
Even with how illogical fear is, I still find myself, worrying. Even if the issue is minor, I can't help but wonder about the possibilities of failure. It seems almost, impossible to avoid all worry. I mustn't fear. It's illogical and is only a hindrance.  
I can run into a battle, plan ready, and aware of everything I must do to win. Yet, in the back of my mind, I worry about losing. I don't want to lose. I can handle if it were just me, but my crew. I cannot let my crew be killed. It bugs me that the odds of losing are so high. I don't want to send my crew in, if we have a high chance of losing. No one else seems to think this way. They are ready to fight no matter the odds. Brave? Yes. Logical? No. Safe? Definitely not. It bugs me, and I don't understand why.   
I've been told I need to quit thinking so much. That is will tire you out, and you'll fight worse. Half of me tells me I should listen. But the other half, follows what I've learned. Never go into a battle, without a plan. Act upon the plan, do not stray. Predict any sudden movements, then change your plan upon them. It is tiring, but I haven't lost yet. So why should I change how I fight? I worry I will lose. I can't help that. I want to change that however. I hate worrying. I hate fear. It's illogical.


End file.
